i apologize that it has taken me two weeks to blog about our sweet daughter's birth, but believe it or not, becoming parents is very time consuming & exhausting! this is the first time i've been on a computer in weeks, even before charlie's birth. but, while she's taking a little nap, i decided to type up our birth story - or what i could remember of it!
on sunday, june 26 (our first wedding anniversary) i woke up at 6:30 am with contractions. i didn't really think much of it because i had been having them on and off for several weeks. but for some reason i got out of bed and went downstairs to relax. i got morgan's anniversary gift all ready for him to open (cards/cubs tickets) and sat around wondering if i should start timing my contractions. morgan moseyed his way out of bed around 9:00, and i told him what was going on. we decided we should go on a walk to try to help things along (if it was the real deal). the contractions were still bearable but i could tell they were consistent - about 5-6 minutes apart. when we got back from our walk, i took an hour nap, but was awoken by stronger contractions. i decided i should soak in the bath. i remembered our childbirth preparation teacher (who became our doula) saying that if you take a bath & the contractions remain, then it's real labor. if you take a bath & the contractions go away, it was probably braxton hicks. well, when i got out of the tub, i was still having contractions, but they had spaced out further - now 10-15 minutes apart. frustrated, morgan and i decided to go on another walk. the contractions grew more intense and slightly closer together, but the inconsistency in time had me doubting it was real labor. we decided we should head into davenport to celebrate our anniversary. first we went to vanderveer park and walked around the rose garden (where our ceremony took place). next we headed to chili's (because we're classy like that) to have some dinner. i couldn't eat...i just felt different. when we got home that night, i remembered that my chiropractor recommended i drink a glass of wine to "knock myself into labor." i decided that didn't sound like too bad of an idea. i laid on the couch and had 3 sips of a $9 bottle of moscato di asti before my contractions became suddenly intense. it was about 9:30 pm at this point. i went upstairs and instinctively started putting together last minute things in my hospital bag. around 11:00 i decided i should lay down and try to get some rest, even though my contractions were steadily coming every 3-4 minutes and were very painful. (i must admit - i was stalling. i had no desire to go to the hospital due to fear of being turned away. i was in denial that this was real labor, even though i was restless & in obvious pain.) finally, my friend heather convinced me that i needed to get myself out the door to prevent myself from giving birth at the I-80 truck stop. (lol.) so, i told morgan to make the call. (this was seconds after he had laid himself down for bed. poor guy.) the midwife gave the go ahead, we called the doula & checked in with her, and the we loaded the car up. we were on the road to the hospital at 12:30 am.
we got to genesis around 1:00 am. they admitted me to triage where they checked my progress. i was severely disappointed to find out that I was 1 centimeter dilated and 70% effaced. this is the SAME point i was at when i went to my last prenatal check-up the thursday before. so, we were instructed to walk the halls in an effort to move things along. about 2 hours later i was 1 1/2 centimeters and 75% effaced. UN. REAL. i couldn't believe it. i was in excruciating pain at this point and was exhausted beyond reason. we returned to the halls to walk, but had already had our minds made up that we were going to go home and try to get some rest after they checked me again. at 4:00 they checked me and i was 2 1/2 centimeters dilated - which gave me my ticket to a room. i remember feeling extremely worried that i wasn't progressing quickly enough, and i began having fears about a c-section. but everything changed very quickly when my water broke on its own about 20 minutes after getting into my room. i'd say that was when things got real. the pain and pressure i was feeling was unlike anything i could ever begin to explain to anybody right now. i felt helpless, hopeless, and defeated. i was already begging for an epidural - the very thing i wanted NOTHING to do with on any level. the nurse was pretty quick to tell me that if i wanted an epidural, i needed an IV and had to go through a bag of fluid before they'd give me any medication. FINE, i said. give me an IV. (intervention #1.) i then remember begging to labor in the tub. my midwife showed up, checked me, said i was 5 centimeters dilated and gave me the go ahead to get in the tub. that was where i spent 90% of my labor. our doula, char, showed up a short time later, and thank God for her. i was at my wits end and morgan was losing his grip FAST. all i remember is her face in mine telling me that i wasn't getting an epidural because i didn't want one. she told me that i could do this the way i planned and that i'd be thankful once my baby was here.
and that was all it took. the epidural as out of my mind from then on (except for one small moment when morgan and i were left alone where i took the liberty to tell him that he didn't effing understand and that i needed the effing epidural NOW. hehe.). from the time that i got into the tub to the time that our precious baby entered this world, i had absolutely no concept of time. i was in the zone. i remember morgan being so sweet and caring while char was my voice of reason. i remember them holding me during contractions and placing ice cold rags on me in between. i remember them reminding me to breathe and make deep noises with each contraction. i remember them telling me how great of a job i was doing and that each contraction was once step closer to meeting my child.
eventually the bathtub became constricting and i felt as if i was being backed into a corner. they helped me out of the tub - but with each movement came another contraction. (yuuuck.) they suggested that i sit backwards on the toilet and experience a few contractions in that position. O-M-G. never, i repeat, NEVER sit on the toilet!! i could have died! so they walked me over to the bed and had me try a position there, but i didn't like that either. then they got out the birthing ball and asked me if i'd like to sit on it and labor there for a while. all i remember thinking was - ew, how many butts have been on this ball? despite the pain & misery i was in, i asked them to put a towel on it! lol. i can't believe i had the energy to even think of that. (by this point it was at least 7:00 am - so i had been awake for over 24 hours.) morgan says i labored on the ball for 20-30 minutes, although to me it felt like 5 minutes. the last thing i tried was lying on my side in the bed. this was where i felt my first urge to push. it was unlike anything i've ever felt before - my body completely took over and was doing exactly what it knew it needed to do. (awesome!) my midwife checked me and said i was 9 1/2 centimeters, 100% effaced and the baby's head was right there. she gave me the go ahead to push. for some reason - and i don't know why - i pushed from my back. this is 100% the opposite of what i wanted to do (and what i should have done). gravity is our friend, people, and when you're on your back trying to push a baby out, you're working against the laws of physics. but, i was so drunk with exhaustion that i didn't really care. my midwife got the mirror out and set it at the end of the bed so i could see what i was doing and know how to push. what a giant help that was!! i pushed for 45 minutes - although it didn't seem that long - and at 8:31 am, little miss Charlotte Joanna Mays was born. morgan and i got to deliver her together, and morgan cut the umbilical cord. i was in absolute shock -- i thought for sure this baby was a boy! i simply couldn't believe that morgan & i had a daughter to love and cherish - such a wonderful surprise! Charlotte - or Charlie for short - weighed in at 7 lb. 12 oz., 19 1/2 inches.
we were so exhausted, but we were even more in love with our sweet little girl; we both managed to stay awake for several more hours, just staring at our baby and falling deeper & deeper in love with each passing moment.
we feel so fortunate and blessed to have experienced birth the way we planned, and to have such a beautiful result. charlie is truly the greatest blessing in our lives and we look forward to watching her grow, learn, and become her own, sweet little person. :)
-the mays'
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| sweet girl scratched her face up before pics :( |
and now for sad news...i started back to work last week. :(!!! monday was definitely one of the hardest days of my life. my sister-in-law, steph, is taking care of charlie during the week until morgan's mom is finished with her seasonal job. my grandma takes charlie on wednesdays which is AWESOME because my grandma lives near my office, so i get to nurse charlie on my lunch breaks. it is so hard leaving her behind for so many hours, but we are so grateful that she is getting such wonderful care!! the only thing that is kind of a bummer is her new dependency on bottles. charlie had been exclusively breastfed up until last week. now she gets a few bottles a day while being babysat, which has made her extremely fussy and impatient when at the breast! silly little girl is quite picky. she will learn!
this past weekend, we had planned a trip to saint louis for the cardinals/cubs game. this was my anniversary gift for morgan and we were SO excited! it was our first family trip and my first MLB game! we were a little over halfway there when the odometer, speedometer, and cruise control all stopped working. confused, we pulled over at the nearest parking lot and shut off the car in an effort to "reboot" the system. when we did this, the car decided to stop working properly and would only go in 5th gear or reverse. so morgan got on the phone with our insurance agent immediately while i got our sweet baby out of her carseat and nursed her. (she had been asleep for the entire 3 hours we had been on the road!!) morgan was calling everyone - ford dealerships, towing companies, etc. trying to get everything figured out. meanwhile, charlie took a massive poo that ended up shooting up her back and leaking through her clothes. i got charlotte cleaned up while morgan continued on his quest to get our car situation figured out. finally, we discovered there was a ford dealership in the very town we had broken down in (palmyra, missouri) and they said they'd come get us. (this was after morgan discovered we had a premium warranty on our car, covering all expenses.) we spent a few hours at the ford dealership, realizing our hopes of making it to the 12:00 cardinals game were dashed. finally, the mechanic told us that we had an intermittent sensor issue and the part wouldn't be in until tuesday. he said the car would run and work just fine, but the issue would appear again at some point - but he didn't know when. we decided that it was best to get a rental car since we had charlie with us. we didn't want to get 20 miles down the road and have the same issue. so we got driven to the nearest car rental place - which was in quincy, illinois. charlie and i sat in the van with the lady who drove us while morgan went and got our car squared away. this is when charlie started to get a little impatient. she began fussing, so i nursed her. but then, after a while, she wouldn't calm down. i was trying everything i could until suddenly, i felt it. poop. all the way up her back, around her sides, and all over her onesie. again. my kid is a poop machine, i tell you!! so i get charlie all cleaned up and morgan gets the keys to our kick ass hybrid honda insight hatchback. LOL! we feel like complete tools in that dang car. after we got the car, we decided we should just drive home. we pulled in our drive around 3:00 pm - about 10 hours after we left. what a disaster!!! all we can do is laugh because it's just one of those things. we are all safe and that is all that matters. we were very fortunate to break down in podunk, missouri versus saint louis! perhaps the most devastating detail of the entire situation (for me) was the fact that charlotte didn't even get to wear her adorable cardinals outfit i had bought her. so, i put it on her today so it didn't go to waste. :)
the rest of the fall seems like it'll be pretty busy. morgan's brothers, logan and jerome, are both in football, so we try to make it to all of their games as weather permits. morgan is also working like a crazy person. he does his normal 40 hours with missman each week and then works another 25-35 hours a week picking seed corn with local farmers. charlotte and i miss him dearly!! we are ready for winter and for things to slow down a bit. maybe then i'll be able to blog a little bit more! (who am i kidding?)
